Find Your Horseshoe Pt. 1

This email has been in draft form for months.....

As I complete it, I'm rewriting my preface.
The last 6 months have been hard on us all - we don't even have to talk about it - we know it.

One of the things that I experienced was losing my authentic voice.
So much to say, yet so much noise already, and I couldn't figure out how to use my words (like I say to my 4-year-old) to make sense to myself, let alone all of you on this mailing list.

One of the things I realized I'd lost was my writing - my blog.
Now, many of you who may be newer to these emails may be used to just getting monthly sales and specials style emails. But this list actually began by me writing stories - sharing experiences - in order to build community. I feel I can write better than I can vocalize.

I wanted to use email to share the good, the not-so-good, and the funny in hopes that maybe somewhere out there if someone else was having a tough time, my words may offer a life raft in this beautiful shit show of life. (always the optimist who finds a silver lining)

I stopped writing to focus on other things - but I lost a part of myself during that journey. So - if you're only looking for the sales and specials kind of emails, I get it and I don't take my open rates too seriously.

If you're looking for a shred of hope or maybe some tidbits of skincare or energy experience...well...I'm back, baby! And I'm starting with a story that began just over a year ago.....

The big shift began as we left the farmer's market.....

I'd just finished putting the stroller in the back of the minivan and was on full speed "get-the-kids-home-feed-them-nap-them-go-to-work" mode. I came around the corner to get in the side of the van to buckle seat belts and WHAM! I hit my head on the top part of the door where the roof meets and instantly heard a weird crunching sound in my neck.

It was a pain I'd never experienced before. My husband did the concussion test and we kept moving through our day, but something felt very off. Since this email has been drafted forever, I'm skimming through to the bullet points.

What followed was months and months of me believing I could handle the pain. I was going to remain in control of the situation. I had this handled. I ate pain killers. I drank wine. I took hot baths. I cried. I was nauseous a lot. I had headaches at least five times a week. But with my current regimen of pain killers and alcohol, by the grace of God, I totally HAD this under control!

Until I didn't. Until I sat back at the beginning of the year, when I take time to write my goals for the year on paper, did I realize that I was not practicing what I preach. I was not listening to that voice inside that kept saying to me, "uh yeah but Brooke - you heard something crunch - you may wanna get that looked at."

I was not interested in hearing my intuition say, "you know you're creating an inflamed interior and it's going to show up on the exterior, come on Brooke you ALWAYS tell people to watch the pills and booze."

The pain woke me up in the middle of the night, literally screaming at me, "WAKE UP AND FIX THIS!"

So it was one night, anywhere from 11-5am when I'd lay awake in pain, that I decided THIS was going to be the year I fixed the problem. I was going to stop pretending I had everything figured out. I was going to stop talking and start taking action. This was going to be the year I fully practiced what I preach. This was going to be the year of self-care.

Now when I say those words, people roll their eyes. The phrase is overused and generalized as fluffy and expensive spa treatments. That's not the case here. Follow me on this...

What I learned from not following my own advice is this: Life is a heck of a lot more peaceful when we work on ourselves first. It may not be pretty all the time. But the payoff - that sweet calm inside - nothing feels as good as that.

It's pure love.

And when we can learn how to love US as we are - it's the stepping stone to being grounded.
When we are grounded and filled with love, calm and peace, our whole aura grows bigger.
And when our aura grows bigger, it sends that peace vibration out to those around us.
By loving ourselves and being calm, we can create peace to all of those around us and maybe even let it trickle out into the world like the waves on the ocean.

xo
B.

So how did the pain go away?? Stay tuned.....